Event planning: It’s all in the lessons learned

In the last 11 months, I have learned more about life and event planning than all my current experiences combined. These are the five most important lessons I’ve learned.

Lesson #1:  Being a planner doesn’t always mean you’re prepared

Nothing could have ever prepared me to answer a 5 a.m. phone call from my father who was given the difficult task of telling me my maternal grandmother had passed in her sleep. I got the call July 1 and within 30 minutes I was on the road and headed to see my mother in Charlotte; six hours later we were waiting on our flight to Israel to depart. During the funeral and the few days following, I could not shake the feeling of loss, or come to accept that Safta Malka will be watching me walk down the aisle from a distance.

Lesson #2: Let other people steer the ship

Buying a house taught me a thing or two about my willingness to fall fast and hard, and commit and power through the cries and keep faith that I have made the right choice. The right choice in agreeing to buy a house with my fiancé, the right choice on the timing, the location, the new financial obligation… the right colors for the walls. The process also taught me to trust more deeply in my fiancé’s decisions and intentions as we continue to lay the foundation for a solid marriage.

Lesson #3: Know your purpose and mission

Revisiting Judaism as an adult is more fulfilling than I imagined it would be. I accompanied my fiancé to two semesters of Judaism 101 classes with Rabbis from across Wake County to support him in his conversion journey. Those classes sparked informative conversations that helped both of us dig deeper into our beliefs, morals, values, and overall approach to our purpose in this world. We both have a better understanding of what each of us is fighting for and how we can help one another be the best versions of ourselves. Knowing us, we’ll continue to have these conversations until death do us apart.

Lesson #4: Organize the troops and build your all-star team

Planning a wedding has given me an opportunity to work with some of the most talented people in our community, and I am beyond excited to share their work with our family and friends. And while I never doubted that my closest friends will be there when I need them, having them as a sounding board to talk through the logistics of the wedding is the best gift a bride could ask for. I am surrounded by genuine, authentic, creative people who love me more than I thought possible. I don’t know that I would have been this upbeat about the struggles and challenges of planning a wedding if they weren’t by my side.

Lesson #5: Perfection is unattainable but meaningful experiences are

At the end of the day our only goal is to share the love we have for one another with the people we love most. I am learning not to lose sight of the forest as I read forum after forum on the proper way to address the invitations. I’ve also decided to ignore having an inner envelope because I care more about the wellbeing of our environment than the traditions of sending wedding invitations. There will be other things that won’t come out perfect; things I could have, should have, would have…. But all I really want to do is say my vows, drink champagne and dance with my husband!


Author: Mor Aframian
Mor Aframian is our Events Planner.

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